Tuesday, September 2, 2014

A Nervous Eve....

I've been working hard to ignore it, but it keeps coming up and tapping me on the shoulder.  It leaves me shaking in my boots but hopeful at the same time.

Tomorrow is Toby's hearing assessment.  I'm trying not to worry, but when your doctor runs several rudimentary tests to see if your baby is hearing and he doesn't respond it quite frankly doesn't look good.  His ears appear healthy and have no sign of fluid behind the ear drum, but our little man still isn't talking or babbling in the fashion an atypical child does.  Heck, he's not even babbling like any of his siblings were at this age!  


Toby, aged 17 months
August 29, 2014
Our beautiful little man has had us fooled.  He communicated without words.  He has the most expressive fact and chocolate brown eyes you could just drown in.  He hasn't needed words to date, and we probably wouldn't have thought anything was amiss for a while yet if someone hadn't mentioned how well their little one at the same age talks and it dawned on me that we still haven't had a "mumma" or a "dada" or even a "bubba" from Mr T.  


I know having a child who has a hearing impairment is very manageable in todays world. In fact I have a niece and 2 nephews with hearing impairments and they are very well adjusted teenagers and young adults now.  BUT and this is what worries me the most...  but, they developed speech.  Toby hasn't.  Their hearing loss wasn't picked up until they were quite a bit older.  I'm worried that the prediction from the Dr of a profound deafness might be true.

We have driven ourselves (well myself) batty watching Tobes for any signs he is responding to sound.  I think my hands are all clapped out and my fingers fatigued from snapping.  I search his eyes for any awareness that may flicker in their depths, or for a twitch on his face which may indicate he heard something... anything....  

today he turned around when I called his name.  I'm hoping beyond hope he heard me.  A silly part of my subconscious says i should cancel tomorrows test because he heard me, but the sensible part of me quickly slaps that lunatic down...  

So this time tomorrow we will know if our little man can hear us, how much and we will have a better idea on what the future holds for us.

I'm a mix of emotions.  

I don't want to admit there is something wrong...

But deep down, my gut is telling me we are on the eve of some huge changes for our family.

Monday, September 1, 2014

Needing to Hold On...

With so much upheaval in the household at the moment I'm needing something to hold onto again.  So much is changing, lots of challenges ahead and TBH I don't think we have been this unsettled for such a long long time... So here I am, starting on the 365 challenge again.  It will at least give me something positive to look for in what could be some very hard days ahead...

So today, September 1st, I started again.  I might upload in weekly lots so as not to bog my blog down with daily images...  

So I should probably admit I actually picked up my camera on Saturday just gone for the first time in many months - and it felt GOOD!!!  We went to the beach at Port MacDonnell with the kid lets (it was Toby and Trixies first visit to the beach) and tried to remember what it was like to relax and forget our worries... it worked :)  



This photo is of our puppy Trixie-Belle... she loved the water and being free on the sand, but most of all she loved to DIG!!!!  


Menu Plan Monday

Week: Sept 3 - 10, 2014
  •  Thursday: Shepherds Pie
  •  Friday: Homemade Pizza
  •  Saturday: 
  •  Sunday:
    • Lunch - Pancakes
    • Dinner - Corned Beef
  •  Monday:  Sausage, Veg and Gravy
  •  Tuesday: Slow Cooked Beef Casserole and Toasties
  •  Wednesday: Porcupine Meatballs and Mashed Potato


    Snacks/Recess: Condensed Milk Cookies and Choc Chip Muffins

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Menu Plan Monday

yes, I know, it's really Tuesday today, not Monday... late again **sigh**



Week: August 28-Sept 3, 2014
  •  Thursday:  Praties (AKA Jacket Potatoes with homemade Garlic Butter, Coleslaw and cheese)
  •  Friday: Homemade Pizza
  •  Saturday: 
  •  Sunday:
  •  Monday:  Slow Cooked Pork Chops with Mashed Potato
  •  Tuesday: Quirky "Fried" Rice
  •  Wednesday: "Take it as it comes"  (Warnambool appts)


    Snacks/Recess:  Butter Cookies and Whole Orange Muffins

Blah!

so much for keeping up here.  I keep thinking I need to post, I need to document this or just update why don't I but procrastination seems to be the thing at the moment.  I could make all number of excuses but that's what they would be - excuse.  5 minutes while the kids are napping should be enough, and would mean I don't need to do a bulk update...  I need to start being more accountable **slaps self**

So we have had a tumultuous time of things lately.  Nathan has had his nasal surgery just last week.  The surgeon was shocked that his nose was 100% occluded from the nostrils all the way through to the sinuses.  What should have been a 45-60 minute operation took just over 1.5 hours!!!  He has had a bit of trouble adjusting to the post surgery routine.  He needed to learn to use a gravity fed netti pot 4 times a day and he is in the middle of a painful healing period.  Hopefully he will be back to 100% soon - I can for certain say that I am glad his snoring, sniffing and apnoea moments have all but stopped!!!

Miss K is causing us a lot of stress at the moment.  Running away, lies, self harm, more suicide threats etc.  She was re-assessed by CAMHS and has been categorised priority 1 and assigned a social worker/therapist.  Through the school she has also been assigned a social worker and a behavioural specialist.  She has had a period of almost 8 weeks of non-attendance of classes without adequate explanation to anyone.  Her stories keep changing so trying to ascertain the truth is incredibly difficult - to the point we simply have given up and just take everything on face value and making judgment calls as things happen and are reported.  She has been referred to the CAMHS psychiatrist for assessment on wether we are dealing with an emerging mental illness as well as ASD.  Hopefully by the end of September we will have something more concrete to work with in relation to our eldest daughter.  It tears my heart apart to admit just how bad things have become, but not admitting or talking about this feels like we are hiding from the truth.  We need to be open and transparent for our own sakes to be able to deal with this whole journey we are on... 

Mr D has started private Occupational Therapy, Speech Therapy and Physio.  OT and Speech both agree he is definitely well into the autism spectrum.  Physio confirm our fears that the public physic here have been causing more issues than assisting his feet issues.  It looks like he will need another series of casting to try and help correct his feet - joy :/  We are about to start filling out paperwork to hopefully get hims some NDIS funding to help pay for his therapies - at the moment we are "robbing Peter to pay Paul" as the saying goes in order to accommodate his sessions.  Dom has also been listed to have his autos assessment in week 10 of this term - that's only 4 weeks away!!!  We should be given a date and time very very soon in relation to this... scary and excited to finally be getting him the help he needs!

Mr A is still happily chugging along.  He has a lovely girlfriend who is very stabilising for him and is loving school and work.  He has been getting very regular hours for work and has even been given opportunities to step into a supervisory role - a BIG thing for him :)  He also has his L's and is begging to drive all the time :)  I'm being strict in not allowing him to drive with the little kids in the car just yet.  one day soon though, he just needs a few more hours under his belt ;)

Mr W is cruising along as well.. nothing major to report from memory...  I do have to follow up his ENT referral to make sure his snoring and apnoea episodes are for the same polyps Nathan just had removed... **mental note made**

Miss A is Miss A... nothing new really...  intermittent gastro issues, piecing up bugs every time we go into town and still no real growth to report.  She is her usual petite little self.  The paediatrician has looked through all her notes and requested some new tests be run for her.  She is determined we will get a diagnosis for our little princess.  No one deserves to go through life not knowing why they are ill.  She agrees too that it is not normal for a child to have blood in their stools, to vomit and poop mucous and to have seriously fluctuating blood sugars (just the other week she dropped to 1.3 bsl with 3.6 ketones and didn't come up properly until way past midnight!!!)  So more blood tests, ruing tests and monitoring - but hopefully with some more answers!!!

I guess this brings me to Mr T... Mr T who was meant to be our last baby, absolutely healthy and perfect in each and every way to show us what raising a "normal" child is like....  Well, Mr T has thrown us a HUGE curve ball....  We only just realised last week T is not speaking.  He is not babbling like a regular baby.  He has not said one word.  Mr T has had preliminary rudimental testing and it appears he may have a significant hearing loss... in fact we have been told to expect him to be declared profoundly deaf.  I can't express just how this makes us feel.  Being deaf isn't the worst thing that can happen, it's manageable.  I have a niece and 2 nephews with hearing loss (due to connexion 26) and they are gorgeous, well adjusted functioning individuals.  They are successful and you'd not know they had hearing loss if you didn't know.  I KNOW it's not a life threatening condition.  but this wait between picking up something isn't quite right to his full hearing assessment next Wednesday is starting to play with my head.  If he is profoundly deaf as expected it means we will have some significant changes to make at home.  We are already starting to introduce some AUSLAN signs into the family to try and see if we can get him communicating a little more that way.  So far he has done pretty well with grunts, crying, screaming, pulling and poking ;)  He is such an expressive little chap and he has his own way of communicating so we hadn't picked it up until now, when he is 17 months old! So I'm a whole turmoil of emotions trying to process this on top of everything else we are dealing with at the moment.  I only want the best for Toby.  We were hoping the Dr would simply say his ears are full of wax, but they are clear and the ear drum appears healthy, so it looks like it is a more structural issue rather than something easily fixed - damn! trying to not get the horse tooooo far in front of the cart but that's difficult too when we have older children asking questions and wanting to know details we just don't know yet - try telling as Aspie that we don't know everything *augh*!! 

so I guess that's it... fun and games, nothing new in some areas, other things coming up and really kicking the feet out from under us.... we have no real choice but to keep moving forward... Time will pass and we will eventually get answers... One step at a time...  and remember to *breathe*

PS:  I've not checked spelling and probably won't read back so they won't bother me...  :P  

PPS:  yes, I probably will actually read back and edit the errors in time, but for now...  deal with them!!  :P :P

Thursday, July 31, 2014

~*~ Apologies ~*~

I have neglected things here for too long.  Life has been one big roller coaster since we were getting ready for our trip to Adelaide.  3rd degree burns, ambulances, hospitals, influenza, fevers, hallucinations, pneumonia, appointments, specialists, police, runaways... If our lives were written in a manuscript no one would believe it was a real story!!!

I aim to get some time online this weekend to update and start the new week off on the right foot and start maintaining things here again.

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Menu Planning umm.. errr.. yeah that!

It's been one heck of a week here.  Mr W has been attending some soccer try-outs for a regional representative side that is playing in Adelaide later this month.  We said he could try out, he's not played soccer since we left Tassie so thought nothing will really come of it... but guess what?  HE WAS SELECTED!!!!  We have a SAPSASA soccer representative in da house :D  Then came the sudden realisation that this trip to Adelaide is in 4 weeks... we read the paperwork that then states that it is all to be covered by us, including an additional $60 registration and insurance fee and they recommend we have him privately covered for accidents insurance, oh and we pay for acommodation, food and travel OH and an adult but be with him at all times... Soooooo, we immediately thought  EEEEEEPPPPP!!!!  At least it is only for the weekend - WRONG! It's a FULL WEEK!!!!!!  *doh* last time we say "yeah sure, go for it" and not reading all the fine print or expecting him to get through;)

We don't want to deny any of our kidlets the opportunity to experience or achieve so we have a very real awakening that our budget is taking a HUGE blow.  We are estimating it is going to cost around $1500 for the trip - at least. 

So no menu planning this week.  Instead of buying in groceries for a set plan I am going to do a stocktake on our pantry and freezers this weekend instead and try to whittle back any small savings where we can and become inventive with what we fine... I foresee a fortnight of interesting breads and rice dishes ;)  We have our 2 iphone 5s that we just upgraded so we will sell them to raise some money and we may have to look at selling one of our cows (we have 2 x 2 year old steers we have on a friends property fattening up for the freezer) to cover the expenses. 

It's going to be tight, but we will do it - always seem to somehow :)